My first job was doing production support at an aerospace prime. This group was riddled with politics, people threw each other under the bus at any time and there were clear underqualified favorite children that moved up the ladder fast. My instinct was to run from this group and in 6 months I took a job at another defense prime hoping for something better. In between jobs one of my best friends father asked me: “Son, why did you leave your job at aerospace prime #1” I responded “I left because of the politics” Although this is nearly 10 years ago at this point I still remember his response and carry it with me to this day. “Son, anytime there are people there will be politics never leave a job solely for politics.”

When there are people, there will be politics

This is a saying that is as old as any in corporate speak but it still holds true today. We like to think of corporate as a meritocracy where the smartest individuals are rewarded and kept engaged however it is unfortunately pretty far from that. Most of you reading this article will be working at some for profit corporation. The goal of this place is to get lots of value from you building things while compensating you for the market rate so you don’t just pack up and leave at a moment’s notice.

The outcome of my decision

I learned my lesson the hard way because in the next role I took there was also politics. Most people, including myself, did not like my manager and due to this it was hard to move up in the organization. I was not given the job I wanted but instead just did the job I was delt. I got annual raises as low as 1% but kept the good work up and tried to learn from more experienced mentors. My boss, although disliked by many, was promoted up through the organization leaving me with a new manager. As soon as the new management took over my raises immediately jumped to 3% (which was good for the company I was at but bad as far as raises go in general).

Never Gossip

With this manager that was promoted up and out of the organization I felt that it was my responsibility to inform the new manager how much people disliked the old manager. This immediately backfired as the new manager went and told the old manager I said this. The lesson to learn here is never gossip about anyone in the workplace as ultimately the majority of people are loyal to their superiors. It takes years to build trust and friendship with colleagues and even though you tell people “hey don’t tell anyone” people do talk. This is why keep negative comments to yourself and keep your future moves, like leaving the team/company, private.

Work Friends

I used to be strictly against having friends at work. I held this mindset primarily because I just didn’t trust people I worked with to become my friends or to hold things in confidence and also because I had a pretty engaging social life outside of work. All of the friends I had at work I previously knew from university. For the most part, the culture at these large aerospace companies was to clock in at 9 and leave at 5 and not stay an additional minute and most people were in a phase of their life where they had significant family obligations and didn’t really want to hang around after work. I held this mindset of separating coworkers and friends until I was 28 years old and on my 4th job, one because the majority of the people that I started working with were transplants and were also looking to make friends but also because I saw this graph of time spent as you age. Most days I probably spend more time with my coworkers than I do with my own wife. It’s sad, but it is the unfortunate reality of work. Then outside of this time with friends is very limited because as you get older your friends also get older and get more obligations. Now I can say that I enjoy not only the work but also enjoy the company of the people I work with.

Conclusion

Its not a bad idea to make some friends at work.

Never say anything negative about another person behind their back. You don’t know who they will tell and ultimatley its only you who will look bad.